lemonpie dreams

i've never tasted one but they sound delicious

Sunday, June 25, 2006

AMNESIA

A couple of days ago I was thinking about millions of things to write here but today I can remember none.
Maybe it is that I slept at 7 am this morning and I woke up at 12 am.
Maybe it is that last night I drank a little more than I usually do.
Maybe it is that I tend to get distracted by one more million things (and that’s the way it should be).
Or it is that a friend borrowed me his mp3 and I’m listening around 20 favorite great songs at the same time and I’m absolutely overwhelmed.
Or that I’m only thinking of the sea and I wish I were on a beach right now as I did yesterday all day long.

Comment: I can't help by listening Nancy Sinatra singing Bang Bang over and over again because it's just brilliant. Voice, music, lyrics, theatrical expressiveness. Great great

Sunday, June 18, 2006

LLOKEN / PART THREE

Lloken felt grateful of little Dorothy for offering him the accommodations he needed during his first night in her rural town. He couldn’t imagine where else he could possibly find a place providing him with a roof above his head right that moment, if it wasn’t for that child.
Unluckily, on the other hand, her mother’s reaction wasn’t the one expected exactly. She wasn’t even in position to let her daughter start talking when she faced that strange man standing beside her in their doorsteps. The only thing she managed to do in her fright was to drag the little girl into the house and close the door harshly.
Even though little Dorothy knew that her mother was at all others a very kind and gentle woman, during their way to her home she warned Lloken that in case she had the reaction she eventually had, he should find a temporary shelter in her tree house. She even showed him in which tree it was located when they were crossing the farmyard, but this was totally unnecessary since it was big enough to be obvious even from a lot more meters away.
That “house” was everything she was most yearning for as a child and on the morning of her sixth birthday she found it solidly constructed almost five feet from the ground in the middle of the big plane tree of their farmyard. Her father was a tab hand at stuff like building and fixing old broken tools, so he found it very easy to build within a night that tree- house for his adorable daughter.
Since the morning Dorothy first faced it and parallelized it with a doll house she had spent countless hours there, decorating it with old useless things she was founding in her family’s house. She had spend many afternoons in there with her two best friends, pretending like they were drinking tea like their mothers were doing. Dorothy would invite them and would take care the place before their arrival in order to be everything in its position and after their leaving she would stay a little more feeling satisfied as she would recall every single compliment her friends had done about how beautiful and how spacious her tree house was. It was indeed very large for a tree house and it was so well- groomed as well that it like a micrography of a proper house. Or most likely, of a proper room of a house
The current moist night Lloken was feeling his stomach terribly empty and his body so painfully tired that he felt like the luckiest man of the world when he found a whole packet of chocolate biscuits forgotten under the small bed he was lying. He swallowed the last bite of those and he only dared to give an instantaneous glance outside the small window as he didn’t want to risk to be possibly seen by anyone. He saw that the only house with a light on at that time was only little Dorothy’s. He assumed that her mother would wanted to know about their uncanny meeting and she would probably telling her how dangerous and risky those days were to talk to strangers; let alone to bring them home.
He was troubled enough already and he couldn’t find the strength to think about Dorothy’s pitiable condition any further, therefore he effortlessly surrendered himself into the peacefulness only sleep is sometimes able to utterly provide people with.
The next morning, Lloken woke up to find a basket overstuffed with food that Dorothy had left for him under the plane tree. He descended the extending ladder and then after taking the basket he ran up again in order not to be seen by Dorothy’s mom or a passer-by. He spent all day up there trying to be the quietest he could and only on afternoon little Dorothy went to see him for few minutes and brought along a slice of bread her mother had baked. She said that she couldn’t bring more because her mother might perceive the extra- missing portion.
Lloken thanked her for her generosity and the compassion she showed to him but he said he should have to go the next morning for to find a proper place to stay and start reorganizing his life for once more. In any case, he wasn’t the kind of man who should hide himself from other people or who could cause a trouble with his presence to a child. The little girl didn’t say anything but her look showed that she was of the people who always think beyond their age and are wise enough to let others do their own way.
Almost twenty four hours after his staying in the tree- house, Lloken was felling numbed by the limited moves he was only able to perform inside the disposable restricted area. He had spent the whole day thinking about the previous day’s predicament and also watching the inhabitants through the small crevices between some of the woods the tree- house was built. He hadn’t noticed anything special apart from few louts who were roaming around all afternoon and were chasing a poor stray dog just to make its life more miserable than already was. Despite that, he embraced the idea that those township men were living a quiet life and they may also were good- mannered in general.
The height and position the tree- house was located, allowed everyone who had access on it to have visual contact with all the houses of the small region the village was extended and having an undisclosed eye on the occurrences. Lloken thought that maybe Dorothy as a kid had probably spent a lot of time staying there and watching curiously the goings- on and maybe, she had probably many times become an unnamed witness of concealed events. However, that day the only thing he watched was, ordinary people doing ordinary things. Nothing more extravagant than men coming and going from their works some more tired than the others or women standing for a while in a point of the central road and having a short chit- chat with other women who were crossing on their way.
Lloken’s thoughts weren’t enough to beat the numbness he started felling all over his body and he decided to run down the stairs and have a quick walk for some minutes. He deemed that he wasn’t in imminent danger to be seen by anyone because it was extremely dark that night and humidity was making it very difficult for anyone to discern that easily a moving shape in a distance. Moreover, the few houses of the province had all turned their lights off since a respectably long time before and tranquility had reigned all around.
It was in truth such a quiet night and even if his hometown weren’t the most crowded place in the world, the present calmness was almost frightening him. It took a while to get used of the silence which in the start felt like it was so strident for his ears and once he did, he attempted to step away from the shadows and move closer to the houses of the village. An inexplicable urgency to make his presence evident shook even his own self.
Although he felt the temptation to prolong his walk, Lloken decided to return and have a rest until the dawn that he decided he ought to leave before everyone’s waking up. He once again thought that he was putting himself in unnecessary danger.
Abruptly and only few steps before he reach his shelter he felt anxious when all of a sudden he saw the lights in each house to go on one after the other almost in chorus. He felt panicked and presumed that everybody had perceived his unauthorized staying in their province and now he had fallen into an ambush by the formerly peaceful- seeming peasants. He started running until he reached the tree- house though he thought that he may should had taken the opposite track and leave the farest and fastest possible. Within a fraction of moment different and irrelevant contemplates crossed his mind. What he was doing there and why he didn’t leave the first night when Dorothy’s mom got terrified, were the main ones.
Not having any abundance of time in his possession at all, he ran up the stairs as fast as he could and he waited there watching from the crevices all the male inhabitants gathering together only few meters away from the tree- house.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

LLOKEN / PART TWO

Darkness had covered the outside view a lot time before he opened his eyes and at that point he was feeling less blurred but the same tired. The first minute right after his awakening he seemed like he couldn’t specify where exactly he was and how he got there.
The girl who was sitting to the seat opposite to his, perceived immediately his sudden frustration but she preferred to pretend that see was occupied with staring at the empty seat right beside him. When the little girl, with the blond curly hair and the tightly kept pink bag in her left hand first got into the train wagon, it was full and she had to anticipate until the next stop in order to find the free seat she was sitting at. Now, even though she, along with the strange man were the only passengers left in that wagon, the little girl preferred not to change her position and go sit somewhere more private and comfortable.
Instead, all the time the man was sleeping in the opposite seat, she was sneakily observing him and moreover, she was creating scenarios inside her imaginative head about his probable situation. This was a way to amuse herself during the boring trip and she had overdid it a little bit more than the appropriate measure by imagining that he may was a dangerous criminal, wanted for a series of murders, or totally on the other way that he may was a missionary who was crossing the country in order to convert the infidels.
When he asked her where exactly were they and if she by any chance knew for how long he had been sleeping, the girl felt disappointed by the regularity of his voice. The myth she was meticulously building
During the whole trip collapsed within a second. She managed to hide that too, and she only told him that they were about to reach the terminal stop in less than a quarter. During that short space the man had won the girl’s trust but he was feeling like priory the girl had won his, because whether he could admit it or not, he had lost his faith in humans a lot time ago.
They both stepped out of the train almost simultaneously and when the man who had introduced himself to that girl earlier in that wagon as Lloken greeted her for goodbye, she proposed him to stay if he wanted to her house for the night, since despite her young age she was clever enough to realize that he had nowhere else to go and was a stranger in her desolated town. He refused kindly, but the girl, who earlier when it was her turn to, replied that her name was Dorothy, assured him that he should have no second thoughts and there were as a matter of fact, two more spare rooms in her family’s house besides the one he could find the rest he so obviously needed. Of course she said that she should ask her mother first but she subsequently clarified that she was very friendly and hospitable with destitute people. Lloken was taken aback by the characterization but he saw his reflection at the stopped train’s window he realized how desperate and weary he indeed seemed.
After the pause they took, the girl added that there was not anything even rudimentary relevant to remind a pension or a guest room in her small township and she pointed with her finger her farm- house which was visible by the place they were standing. As he had nowhere else to go, he accepted that kid’s proposition, and without knowing he experienced firsthand the fact that she was accredited between her relatives for her strong persuasiveness.

Monday, June 12, 2006

RANDOM PICS




Sunday, June 11, 2006

FARM KIDS VOL. II




FARM KIDS VOL. I




LLOKEN / PART ONE

The young gangling man had started feeling exhausted after the long walk in the clammy dirty streets. Not even for a second he worried about where he was going, but his mind was only preoccupied in the circumstances he was trying to escape from.
He only realized that apart from his clothes, his shoes were sweaty too and he assumed that his toes would probably be blue with cold the time he had almost reached the small train station, which was sited pretty damn far away from his neighborhood and his house. The house he had spent the prior years.
As he was every second getting closer and closer and the decrepit station was becoming part of his optical field, he was thinking that the entire place may was deserted and no longer in use for the public because not a hint of human presence was anywhere around. Few moments later and as he was passing from the half- opened door to the inside of the forsaken building, he almost relieved, discerned an obsolete dusty blackboard, which probably and hopefully was a reliable time- table board. He thanked God that for this once, good will was by his side since he had guessed correctly. It was what he had hoped for, but the records which could be proved useful were so clumsily hand- written that no one could have read right the schedule on it. He only managed to understand, without being one hundred percent sure of course, that a train was either about to come by from that specific place that current day or maybe that it already did.
He hadn’t made out the time it was supposed to appear but he unconsciously gave a glimpse at his watch and only then he realized that it was nearly afternoon. Of course apart from the time he hadn’t understood which the name of its destination was as well, but right that moment this would be the less important information of all. Only one thing mattered for him. Getting away from that place. Getting away from what was hunting him. He was yearning to go somewhere far; as far as he possibly could.
The moment he started believing that the train had already passed from there some time earlier that same day, was actually the moment he heard the sound of it coming. Few seconds later and as it stopped right in front of him, he felt a little bit overwhelmed by different and contradictory emotions. He felt confused and unready because this would be his first time of jumping inside a train but most of all, he felt confident about the correctness of his act and in a strange way he also felt forced to grab his tiny old-styled handbag and get into that train which seemed like the medium for a new and chiefly, still unshaped life.
It didn’t take him as much as someone would expect, to feel his body warm and dry again and at once he considered about what he was leaving behind and about his life always being about dirty damp streets and deserted premises. It was always the same. Always about silly chases and stupid fights between him and his true or interior or undefined enemies.
Now as he was staring outside the window and as he was watching his familiar views which hadn’t changed much through years, becoming smaller and smaller in his eyes because of the rapidly acquired distance, a sudden and unprecedented wave of anxiety about the unknown overcame him.

A POST ABOUT SUBSQUENT POSTS

The weekend is coming to its end but good spirit stays on since tomorrow is a day- off as well. It’s been a busy but interesting at the same time weekend I can say. Today I’m planning to post many things I’ve been doing lately and these are the following two. The first part of a short story I wrote named “Lloken” and some photos of me and my friend E. we took yesterday while enjoying countryside.
Extendedly, as regards the story, I finished it between Friday and Saturday which were exactly one year after I had started it. No, it didn’t took 12 months to write a 5000 word story but it’s just that I had wrote the 1st part then –without knowing exactly what I was writing about- and before a while ago I read it again from my PC files and I decided to evolve it. So that’s and the story behind the story actually about “Lloken”. That’s all.
About the pictures, we happened to be in a wonderful vast green- yellow area with a water- tank -if that’s the word- for the farmers to water their fields and we realized it was too beautiful and photogenic to not depict its handsomeness.

Friday, June 02, 2006

I JUST TALK AND TALK

These two photos are taken from a day we went to the sea. I don’t want to add something related to them but just that the text in the second pic is taken from a song called “Front row” by Alanis Morissette.

Irrelevant issue: but I really like this artist. It’s already been almost a decade since I started listening to her music and I still do with the same pleasure. I think there’s an essence in her writing and compositions and I guess that’s what makes a song which is published in 1995 or 1997 still being “in valid”.

Because really, 1995 or extendedly that era more likely, was a whole different world if you seriously think about it and most thing/habits etc have changed since. Our routines, our views, our perspective, our angst expressions, our enjoyments, our fashion criteria, everything. Only few things have stayed the same, or at least that’s the way I see it. And I think that the things that are still the same are the things that used to be important and truly meaningful. Maybe those things were the one's we were more primitively and instictively connected with and not violently -or not- imposed with. Like our true instictive reactions on loving, arguing, getting connected, getting upset, sympathise, concern and a bunch more things.

NOTE: I really don’t know how I referred all these -beside the point- matters. My only intention was just to post these two photos.



 
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